This is the time of year I review my gardening notes from the past year to learn from my mistakes and apply the lessons of experience to next year. This may be where New Year’s resolutions come from. At any rate, in the coming year I have resolved to:
Come inside when it snows.
Put fresh batteries into the water timer at the beginning of the season. I forgot one year and when I realized what had happened, my spinach had withered, Popeye had died of starvation and Brutus had run off with Olive Oyl. That’s a lot to have on your conscience.
Remember I am barefoot before I stomp on slugs.
Not curse slugs and sow bugs so loudly that it scares the neighbourhood children.
Use the right tool for the job (a hammer provides enormous satisfaction when exterminating slugs, but without proper hand and eye protection things can get a little messy).
Bring all my tools inside after each gardening session, especially my cordless drill.
Train the cat to kill slugs and sow bugs, but not eat them because her breath is already bad enough.
Not buy any more packets of seeds than I need. I have run out of both jars to store them in and shelves to store the jars.
Not think about politics when I’m gardening. I am supposed to be relaxing.
Not think about the kids when I’m gardening. See above.
Double dig new beds to aerate the soil.
Don’t double dig because it disturbs the micro-biota.
Buy an expensive broad fork because it will break up the hardpan and aerate the soil without disturbing the micro-biota.
Don’t buy a broad fork because I won’t use it often enough to justify the cost. Besides, it’s heavy.
Stop contradicting myself.
Nag David until he builds a bigger compost bin.
Be more careful about complaining to David. I mentioned a couple of times that my garden was too small, so he bought two acres across the street. If I tell him I need a bigger compost bin he might buy the house next door, and I like my neighbours.
When I prepare a meal with my garden vegetables I will not point out every single time that I grew them myself.
Follow the advice that I write in these columns.