By Chris Wilkinson
Last month’s column on burnout received a lot of attention. I can only surmise that it’s because so many of us have either gone through it in recent months or are going through it currently.
Many of us are in the sandwich generation, whereby we still have children at home while also caring for aging parents. Not to mention a bustling career and requests for our time at every corner! It’s overwhelming. It’s concerning.
Indeed, stress management is becoming the topic du jour — and for good reason! It’s killing us.
Resiliency is the increasingly popular term describing our ability to handle stress and bounce back.
Here is my top 10 list (not in order) of popular resiliency building strategies. I’m certainly not suggesting that all of them need to be acted upon. That would be, well, overwhelming. Pick the one or two that resonate with you the most and focus on an immediate plan of action for them.
1. Journaling/reflecting and practicing gratitude DAILY. Have you ever noticed that you cannot possibly be anything other than positive when you are in a gratitude moment? And like most things, your gratitude skill improves with daily practice.
2. Re-framing your mindset such that you focus on your strengths and view your life as a series of experiences and not as mistakes but rather opportunities to learn. This is the basis of optimism.
3. Acceptance of yourself. Realizing you’re the only “you” there is in the universe and that’s a pretty cool thing. This means stopping the comparison-to-others pattern. And also means being vulnerable, and reading a Brene Brown book (or watching her on YouTube).
4. Avoid sugar and alcohol. Are you being honest with yourself here? These are energy and resilience KILLERS!
5. Spend more time with people you admire. Reconnect with people, places, things that are deeply important to you. Being around others you highly respect elevates your game. Or for calming/centring, being in nature and enjoying the peaceful stillness that a nature trail and a stream bring is relaxing for many. Better yet, go with your significant other. And share things that are troubling you with someone you trust.
6. Practice saying “no” to stuff that’s not serving your goals/priorities. Learn to say “no” more and quit being afraid to offend someone if you do have to say no.
7. Deal with stuff as it arises. Handle it once! For instance, avoid lingering arguments or allowing relationship issues to persist. Figure it out! Deal with things as they arise and handle it once…not over and over again.
8. Cut down on your TV/electronics time. If you complain about being too busy, then binge watch 10-plus hours per week, your prioritizing is the problem. The 2015-16 “Netflix Binge Scale” study showed that many people completed an entire series in five days, on average, with two hours and 10 minutes of viewing per day. And TV doesn’t even include your YouTube time, Facebook time, Twitter, Instagram, Snapchat, etc. Have you totalled all of those up in a week? Or even a day?
9. Quit trying to control everything in your life! Try to shift your mindset to “adventure” mode and enjoy the ride more. An improving tolerance for uncertainty will result in less anxiety related to a need for certainty and control.
10. Exercise daily and eat better. How many times have you heard this? There’s a reason for that. A nightly walk outside after dinner, with a friend or partner, is more valuable than you realize. Reducing the “bad” foods and increasing your water intake and lean protein at every meal is a great place to start.
I guarantee that if you pick your own top two strategies from the list above, create a real plan around them, and act on it, you’ll notice a significant reduction in stress and real boost in mood and fulfillment. I only hope that you place the importance on it that it deserves.
Prioritize. Grow. Find more joy. Be resilient.
Chris Wilkinson is the owner/GM for Nurse Next Door Home Care Services for Cowichan and central Vancouver Island. For more info visit www.NurseNextDoor.com or for questions or a free in-home Caring Consult call 250-748-4357, or email Chris.Wilkinson@NurseNextDoor.com